September 26, 2015

Wicked Musings: Why I'm Such An Introvert

Well, hello~ I'm presenting a new feature on the blog. Wicked Musings is where I'm going to post my non-bookish feelings and a part of myself on Internet for all the world to see.

I'm a self-confessed introvert. And it's weird that I'm about to finish my bachelor's degree in Mass Communication, a not-so introvert kind of degree program. I didn't realize I was one until I stumbled upon this Buzzfeed post about introverts and I realized why I act a certain way. Because of my introvertedness ( I know that's not a word. I made it up. Deal with it. ), people think that I'm a snob because I wouldn't glance your way or that I have this certain air about me that makes people stay away from me. They say I always have my resting bitch face, but I highly disagree.

I rarely attend parties. I used to when I was 18 but not anymore because I grew tired dressing up and going to bars and drinking till I drop. I got tired of meeting random people who I wouldn't remember or wouldn't remember me the next day. I had to study that's why I rarely go out anymore even if I really wanted to. My grades were falling so I had to bring it back up again. But even then, I realized that I have better things to do with my time rather than going out.

Ever since I stopped going out with friends, I became socially awkward. It's hard, okay. People think that talking to others is really easy but it's not. I'm always nervous. I'm nervous about not saying the right thing. I'm nervous because people judge and I don't like being judged. Who does right? I'm so awkward like that. I feel bad about that actually. I don't like my friends to think that I don't like hanging out with them. I just do. But I really prefer being by myself. (Unless, you treat me out, then I'm game!)

I partly blame my love for  reading for my introvertedness. And the TV shows I watch. I have so many books I have to read that I need more time alone to read it! (What an excuse, I know.) But bookworms like myself know that this is a real problem and we deal with this on a daily basis. *insert evil smirk*. I enjoy reading. I enjoy immersing myself into different worlds, different stories, different places and I could do that in the comfort of my comfy chair.

To set things straight, I'm not a snob. But I will be if you're a snob to me. My resting bitch face will always be there and there's nothing I can about it. God made my face like this. I love "me time". I highly value "me time". If I'm being quiet, that can mean so many things. Just know, that I will never make the first move. As I said, I'm socially awkward and this will probably live on until I die. But that doesn't mean I'm not approachable. I really am, okay. It's just that, I don't make the first move. (This is probably why I won't ever have a boyfriend or any guy talk to me. Heh.)

I hope that shed a light to who I am as a person. Until next time~!

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